I have been overwhelmed this last week.  I know part of it was not having Jake around for 3 days and there was another part that really had to face what living with a toddler is going to be like.  Now that were done with the nursing, she really isn’t a baby at all any more so we made some big organizational progress and packed up all the small baby toys and sealed up the baby clothes.  No more baby.  I know there are complicated emotions here, but there’s more to this story.

When Jake has gone out of town for business before, I’ve always lazied away the first few days then gotten my act together just before he came home–so the clean house would make him think that’d I’d been productive the whole time.  This trip, I cleaned the first day but by the time he came home, we’d degenerated into mild chaos again.

Cleaning is very near the bottom of the things I like to do list. Having a clean house is pretty dang near the top.  I’m so stressed when the house isn’t clean, and even worse so when I clean and can’t see the results a few hours later. Not only is it terribly discouraging, but it invariably sends me into a downward spiral of feelings of inadequacy.   I know that having a clean house doesn’t make me a better person, wife or mother, it just would be really nice if it was clean.

So–as I was clearing up the accumulated clutter this afternoon, I had a brilliant (perhaps) revelation.  I walked up the stairs, carrying my sewing machine and basket, and almost set it down next to the little storage cabinet in our bedroom.  My first inclination was to leave it on the floor and add to the mess on our bedroom floor.  Then, I thought, I bet it would only take 30 seconds to finish putting this away.  It took 26.

Most things only need 30 more seconds.  We rush around all day and when I finally get some no-baby time, the last thing I want to do is spend an hour cleaning up the day’s mess.  I think that if Jake and I each spent 30 more seconds at the end of each task, it will significantly cut back on the time I’m spending to clean.  And, most importantly, the time I’m spending feeling guilty for not cleaning.

I know I can’t make a major change right away, but my goal is 30 seconds/30 days of a clean car.  If we can do it there, I know I can bring the system into the house.

What works for you???  Is it possible to wrangle a toddler, run a freelancing business and keep the house moderately tidy?  I don’t need perfection, but I’d love to hear what you think.

For the next week, we’ll be here:

(edit: so I broke a big web rule and just linked to a photo.  Sorry. I’m still on vacation but I promise a post on Monday.)

I doubt I will be blogging. But come by, you never know. I do know I will be drinking a lot of these:

For all of you who have recently found this blog due to my mom ramblings, this post is going to take us back to the original idea behind my spending naptime in front of a laptop. Yes, I don’t want to clean or do laundry, but I also wanted to write about some of the things I’m wrestling with but without the time it takes me to put together a full essay. So, today will be hopefully less snarky. No promises though.

One of the reasons I named the blog after Mircea Eliade’s The Sacred and the Profane, is because I find myself constantly in a state of flux between the two. I would like my life to be more filled with the sacred but I also love Cheetos. And How I Met your Mother. What’s a girl to do?

The biggest way our family encounters the sacred is through specific actions (you can call them rituals) associated with the ancient practice of the Eastern Orthodox church. We light incense and candles, we listen to Byzantine chant, we bow and prostrate ourselves before icons–all of these things serve to transform what could be an everyday activity into something outside our selves. By engaging our senses in the act, it propels our entire bodies into a more sacred frame of mind. I love how these things help me get out of my own head and engage our daughter in the prayers and life of the church.

See exhibit A–incense is fun:

It’s been pretty easy to integrate these sorts of things into our life. I can’t imagine trying to explain the concept of God or church or prayer to a young child without these tangible helps provided by the Church.

But. There’s another one out there. Just for us ladies.

The head covering.

If you’re interested in the most turned to article about this in American Orthodoxy go here. If you think I’m crazy and spitting in the face of feminists everywhere, please feel free to leave a comment and I’ll post your opinion. That’s fair.

I still don’t know where I stand on this one so I’m open to both sides but the topic seems to keep coming up.

I read this article in Slate a couple of nights ago about how some Muslim women decide to put on and take off their head coverings, called hijabs. I know we’re not Muslim, but it was an interesting perspective because part of my hesitation has always been that once I start covering my head during the liturgy or prayers–it’s for good. And I’m young and impetuous.

So that’s one part of it. But on the other hand, I’m all about acknowledging that church isn’t just something to do on Sunday mornings to build business contacts and make sure our daughter learns morals. I believe we are worshiping a holy God and that we engage in something radically different than the secular world outside the church doors. If wearing a scarf over my head helps to enhance that differentiation for me (and someday my little girl) then perhaps I just need to get over myself.

Being Orthodox in America is an interesting experience. That may be about as generic of a statement as it gets, but yeah.

…that I didn’t take.

Here is a link to a beautiful photo essay by Jackie Nickerson, from her latest book of photos titled, “Faith.”

The photos depict Ireland’s Catholic monks and nuns, people who have chosen to practice their faith through what she describes as an “institutional life.”

I’ve been thinking about this for a while, now that our home is littered with the inevitable accumulating detritus that comes with having a toddler.  She has a few toys that I love.  They are wood or fabric and feel hand crafted and I don’t really mind when I find one stranded in the middle of the hallway.

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Katie Thomas at the NY Times has this fun story about the sisters at Our Lady of Guadalupe Monastery in Arizona.

“In debt from the recent purchase of a nearby parcel, the Benedictine nuns are hoping to make a dent in their mortgage by converting their 10-bedroom spiritual retreat into a crash pad for Super Bowl fans this weekend. ”

Yes, you can pray for your team but there’s no alcohol or smoking allowed.

The good folks at Get Religion alerted me to this story about old church buildings being converted into condos.

A great quote from the developer:

“I wanted to retain the spiritual integrity of the building,” she said. “I didn’t want people to come in and say, ‘What did it used to be?’ If it looked just like any other building down the block, what would be the point?

“I like to think of it still as a sacred place, with 100 years of sacred practice. You don’t disregard that.”

Should a church become a condo?  Be torn down?  Be renovated at tremendous cost?

For a very short period, Jake and I looked at buying an empty church in Ireland to turn into a home/retreat center.  It was in the middle of nowhere but made me feel like a Pilgrim at Tinker Creek.  Things never worked out and I’m glad we live here in Orange County, but it’s a beautiful place to remember.

I still can’t help but read articles about “new” movements in evangelical Christianity.  This week: Church changes it’s name to be cool.  Goodbye First Baptist. Hello Mosaic.

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No, I’m not talking about Walt Disney.

The LA Times has this article about the new Billy Graham museum. The 40,000 square foot facility is a shrine to America’s most famous evangelist. Billy Graham packed stadiums with a simple message of salvation. The museum uses a talking cow to do the same trick. The $27-million
museum
also boasts
a splash of
Disney, and
that’s troubled some
of Graham’s admirers.The $27-million museum also boasts a splash of Disney, and that’s troubled some of Graham’s admirers.

While Graham gave his blessing once he was persuaded that the museum would serve as a “perpetual crusade,” many followers, including family members, are wondering if the facility should be a little less gimmicky.

The Times quotes Graham as saying, “I’m humbled that anyone would want to honor me in this way,” he said in an e-mail interview. He added that he’d instructed Franklin and other museum designers “to point people to Christ rather than to make it too much about me.”

This brings to mind the Holy Land theme park, “Where Jesus Walked” that made the news in 2005. I don’t know the status of the proposed development outside of Jerusalem, but I do remember wondering if there was a way to make Christianity any more commercial.

Despite Billy Graham’s blessing, I fear a talking cow isn’t the best way to spread the gospel. But then, I go to a church where the services haven’t changed in 1600 years.

Last Sunday, I introduced my daughter to the art of Frieda Kahlo and Enrique Grau. Mind you, she’s only eight months old, but I’ve now established she’s a big fan of mid-century Cuban art. We went from image to image, I would point out something of interest–at her age it’s more like a cat than example of cubism, but we’re starting young. She made her little noises and would reach for the paintings she particularly liked. She was engaged in the experience and thankfully wasn’t so loud that she interrupted the church service in the background. Read the rest of this entry »